What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot
What’s big and green and will kill you if it fell on you?
A golf course
Why did the hedgehog cross the road?
To visit his flat mate.
What’s red and bad for your teeth?
A brick.
What’s brown and sticky?
A stick.
How do cows subtract?
With a cow-culator.
What did the fish say when it swam into the wall?
Dam.
What’s pink and fluffy?
Pink fluff.
What’s blue and fluffy?
Pink fluff holding its breath.
What’s black and white and falling down the stairs?
A nun
What’s black and white and laughing?
The nun that pushed her!
What do you get if you deep fry Santa Claus?
Crisp cringle.
What’s furry and minty?
A polar bear.
Christmas cracker jokes
Moderator: dingo
Re: Christmas cracker jokes
lol, ur such a bum!
did u actually get them jokes from a christmas cracker?
did u actually get them jokes from a christmas cracker?
Re: Christmas cracker jokes
a bum?? harsh much eoinzy!
nah i got most of them by text but their originally from christmas crackers
nah i got most of them by text but their originally from christmas crackers
Re: Christmas cracker jokes
Wow, I wish I lived in Cork! You guys sound cool!! 
Ah no, I'm only codding ya around the plaice! In fact......GET ME MORE OF THESE JOKES!!!
Ah no, I'm only codding ya around the plaice! In fact......GET ME MORE OF THESE JOKES!!!